bookish dreamer

ok, so, um. i got buried under an avalanche of preparation. and disappeared. from the internet. i also technically did three talks in the space of four days. And one of those was literally across the country, so i flew there and back and presented.

but i'm back!

Tuesday I presented for half an hour. My presentation was one in this series our Visual Studies Program does called "Objects of Knowledge" - it's where a grad student presents their dissertation work to an audience, kind of a mock-job talk but with a formal discussant (who is a professor who responds to your presentation with comments and questions), and I was totally and utterly nervous about it.
A) because it was the longest presentation of my work I would have done to date
B) I haven't actually *done* the work I thought I was going to have done to, you know, present about it
C) the Vis Studies department has all the hard ass professors in it who call you on your shit, so I was terrified about what questions they might come up with

What actually happened? I think I did just fine! I certainly had plenty to talk about, my preparation of materials was thorough, I lined up a discussant who works on visual media but doesn't really work on Japan, and I'd presented at *another* conference the weekend before AND done a mock-talk practice session on Monday. Another professor at the university, who works on Slavic SF, emailed me about the talk and actually brought some of his undergrads (and even though the talk probably went over their heads, he was very complementary about it and we're supposed to get coffee soon to discuss our respective projects). My advisor came to the talk (which is good since this is the second time I think he's engaged with my work, lolz). And although his comment was his own particularly fantabulous kind of response, with interconnected linkages and stylistic flourishes, i think on the whole it was positive and encouraging. And my girlfriend who made it to the talk did say that she thought I nailed the Q&A, not because I had answers to every question but because I didn't get derailed by any of the questions, acknowledged these were areas that I needed to look into, and admitted when I hadn't considered something with grace. I did speak too quickly (but my mom points out probably part of the reason for that is I'm a fast talker in real life too - so my 'natural' pace isn't natural to hear except for me).

so that was that! And the whole earlier talk? was at Harvard :) which sounds cooler than it is, since it was a grad conference (and not the best planned one). But it was my first trip to Harvard! So yay! And my first time taking a red-eye flight (which I probably will not do again? i dunno, i don't think i got good sleep, I started hazing out around 3 pm, but it was nice to get there in the morning and have the whole day). I did get great feedback from the discussant on that panel as well, which was cool, since the content of the talk was a little different, and I've already had three or four people from the conference email me about staying in touch (so yay! networking!)

But ugh. All the prep work? basically I've been working on keeping my head afloat while I wrote the papers then also configured the presentations for both pieces, and dear gods that takes time. More time on the presentations (which I do in Prez, OMG do you knwo about Prezi? if you don't, please ask me!!!) than on the written talks (well, on the draft text, since I go over and over the talks more than once.

The upshot? I'm tired. I'm pleased though. And I have some draft materials that hopefully, once I clean up the language a bit, will lead to rough draft of my first chapter. OH, and this week I got mid terms to grade, so that will be my entire weekend.

despite that, I'm IN LOVE WITH the current story line on Teen Wolf and keeping up with it! It was definitely one that fandom COMPLETELY CALLED like a year or so ago? And is super awesome that the show people decided to go with. But it's hard watching it in pieces waiting to see what's going to happen. ARG. Episodic TV = ARG.

speaking of non-episodic TV, I also on my day of post-talk rest yesterday watched all of the second season of House of Cards. Is anyone else on my flist into it? I love it and am totally repulsed by it at the same time. I have *thoughts* but will hold those for a different post.

Getting sick is not productive.  And sure, you say, "I knew that already, trust me" but for me this last week has been an exercise in forced remembrance.  For a week I've felt as if I was pushing too hard trying to break through some invisible barrier of "behind" to get to the point where I'm ahead.

My rough draft of my conference paper was due today to my adviser (and if you count a draft without a conclusion I just sent it to her at 11:34 pm), translation of a page or so of text (of a fantastic little story called Hanabi [Fireworks] by Uchida Hyakken) was due in class Mon & Wed and it was a little painful to get through, along with the kanji quiz per day.  Plus I found myself taking an active role in the conference-from-hell planning, which meant I worked (probably too much) on things all last weekend while I still felt about 50%, then on sending emails.  Much needed relief came this afternoon when my grad seminar was canceled due to the hurricane (well, not due to the actual weather, but scheduling difficulties on the part of our prof) and while on the one hand I'm depressed that I didn't actually get the chance to prove i did the 200 or so pages of reading for this week's class, at least it's reading I won't have to re do next week.  And I worked on the paper.  And volunteered to co-chair the East Asian Studies graduate student stuff until I can get someone else to do it (which will be at some point, but right now it's monthly meetings -- and compared to the conference-from-hell monthly meetings are ... soooo far away).

the only way i've managed to be as productive as i have is through massive infusions of vitamins - a vita-C here, a double-boost jamba juice yesterday, b-monster Odwallas on tuesday and wednesday and m/w/f i've been a good little munchkin and had apple juice.  I don't think I've drunk this much juice this consistently since I was a kid.  Other than expensive, its not as bad as I remember it.

So this weekend?  I want to collapse.  Instead I need to get started on my abstract for my master's thesis.  Whew. 

OH, but about that?  has anyone ever heard of this movie [ tokyo gore police ] ... cuz i think it might work as a second text.  not cyberpunk though as far as i can tell (oh, and warning, the link is not for the faint of heart)

first things first, elizabuffy and lilianvaldemyer (and any other Willow/Tara shippers on my flist) you should go check out this beautiful and heartrending W/T picspam by mouthfullofdust ... it goes through all of their time together through the whole show.

( second, it was my beloved's birthday!!  )

( third, school, oh you (planning, rants, annoyances) )